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By Dirk de Bruin Monday, September 03, 2012
Confidence can improve your life in many ways, but it isn't always easy to practice. Becoming a confident person is a choice you make, and a process you may need to work at in order to end up where you want to be.
You may want the improvements that self-confidence can bring to your life – a higher salary and more friends – but it’s hard to know exactly what to do to make yourself more confident. I offer you these tips for becoming more confident. See what kind of a difference they can make in your life.
1) Never discount your achievements.
It is very easy to get caught up on all the negatives – all the things you haven’t done, all the things you tried that didn’t work, and the times you were late or didn’t get something done – and that’s a really easy way to drag yourself down. In order to build up your confidence, make it a point to focus on what you have accomplished. No matter if it is something as simple as remembering a small detail, taking time to help someone, making an improvement that you’re proud of, or turning in a project before its deadline, you do something every day that you can use to build your self-confidence. Every achievement and victory is important, and remembering to take pride in the things that you do will help you to change your mindset into one that is more focused on all the positives in your life.
2) Start the day off with a mantra.
It might seem cheesy or trite, and something you’ve heard a hundred times before, but having a motto or a mantra to help you focus your thoughts and start the day off right can be a great way to build your confidence. A mantra is something that you repeat to yourself each day, a reminder of who, and where, you are -- a crucial step in the process of becoming who you want to be, and where you want to be. If it helps, don’t just repeat a mantra, but write it down and hang it somewhere you can see it every day, such as your bathroom mirror or refrigerator door. However, it is very important that you repeat it to yourself. One of the following may be useful for you, or you can research or write your own mantra. Remember: it should be uplifting, helpful, encouraging, and (above all) remind you to be more confident in your abilities.
• I am determined to know the truth about myself.
• I will dare to be a little eccentric.
• I refuse to allow rejection to keep me from taking the initiative.
• Self-confidence is about progress, not perfection.
• Positive things happen to positive people.
If you are very experienced and excelling at a particular activity, although you may be close to an expert level, there is nothing wrong with continuing to practice in order to get better. Published writers do not stop doing writing exercises once they become published, concert pianists do not stop practicing because they are performing in front of thousands of people, black-belt martial artists do not stop once they have been awarded their black belt or won a competition. All these people reached the top of their game by practicing, and they will stay at the top because they have confidence that in working so hard to get where they are they have learned the skills to continue perfecting their abilities. Doing what you’re good at will also help remind you of the positives in your life and the excellence of which you’re capable.
4) Practice what you’re not as good at.
If you have something that you are working to improve, don’t forget to dedicate time to practice to these skills as well. If you are a sales person who is trying to get better at making cold calls to clients, you won’t get better if you don’t make those calls. If you are a dancer who is trying to master a difficult move or an athlete who is trying to improve your game, you won’t achieve either of these without daily dedication to making that improvement. Once you have reached the goal you’ve set for yourself and have achieved this milestone you will be able to look back with confidence and say “I did it!” and count it amongst your achievements.
5) Try new things.
One of the great things about life is how rich with experience it can be. There are thousands of activities you could try, but trying anything is both a challenge. Yet simply the act of trying is also an accomplishment. Any time you step outside your comfort zone and take on the challenge of something new – taking an art class, going skydiving, trying a new type of food – you have accomplished something by just trying. Whether you find that you like it or not, you have learned something and can take confidence in the fact that you have pushed yourself.
There are many ways to improve your confidence, and you may find that some suggestions work better for you than others, but it is always important for you to find purpose to your life in order to boost your confidence. Purpose drives and motivates each of us and reminds us of the value of our lives. Value isn’t simply about what we enjoy or what we are good at, but what good we do for others and what we contribute to the world around us.
The satisfaction that we feel by being reminded of how strong we are, what we are good at, and what we are capable of can easily push each of us to achievement. And then that achievement feeds confidence. It’s a self-reinforcing cycle. So, begin today. Jump right in with both feet – there’s no other way to improve self-confidence.
About The Author: Dirk de Bruin (aka Diggy) used to be super shy with zero confidence. At the age of 18 he decided to change that and over the next 5 years became super confident in life, business and relationships. He is now teaching others how to be confident with articles such as this one, first published on his website, FlawlessConfidence.com.
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